Or Jon.

Probably Jon.

I spend all my time in my house, in my tower, with my laptop and my vast web of cables. I have a cable for everything, you see - audio cables, power cables, support power cables, external hard drives, sound rounders, internet routers, pen tablet, USB pet rock, every cable ever invented. If I tried to move, I would experience some difficulty and likely cause an explosion by tripping the self-destruct cable (or one of the eight or nine in this web, anyway.)

So it's 12 in the morning, and I have exhausted all hope and connection to the outside world (two internet cables and wifi aren't always enough if you have no motivation; like a highway with no car). I have video games but they are too scary, as I am the kind of person who mashes the keyboard at the first sight of an enemy, pauses the game to collect themselves, restarts the game, and promptly returns to violent keyboard mashing in the hopes of killing the icky zombie thing. Not a great bedtime activity.

Sleep, I find, is a lot like booze: instead of dealing with my problems, I ignore them and send myself into a state of comfortable baby-like indifference, like a frat boy drowning out memories of class or the upcoming exams with a keg. Only my way doesn't have a nasty hangover and the discovery of several genital diseases.

I'm wondering about selfish things, such as my attractiveness to others, my sub-par artistic skills, my hypocrisy. I wonder if anyone is reading this. I mean, beyond skimming. Because there's plenty of more entertaining crap on the internet, I assure you, so why are you here?

I regret lots of things right now.

I'm going to sleep.